A is for Ashtray. You Heard Me.

We come across any number of alphabet themed items for babies, featuring such tried and true subjects as animals or…well, animals. But I think I’ve just found one that tops them all in the Modern Child-Unfriendly Alphabet. As in not friendly at all. As in absolutely hilarious.

In this alphabetical series, available at awesome UK emporium Twisted Twee, A is for ashtray, P is for plastic bag and X is for x-rated–featuring a piggie and a duckie in a wholly unnatural interspecies act. Each letter can be ordered on a tee shirt, which I see as either a must-have for the cynical parent set, a new baby gift from a passive-aggressive ex, or perhaps just a non-ironic reminder for childproofing-happy parents of what to keep out of the kiddies’ hands.

Fortunately, the tees only come in sizes 12 and 24 months. Any older and you might be just a wee bit more reluctant to stick your kid in an M is for Matchbox shirt. Or not. –Liz