Is your child misbehaving these days? Do not become alarmed. Every child goes through the phase of disobedience and it is your responsibility to take control and behave wisely. The way you handle your child can have a huge difference in his or her behavior.
Even though we all want to raise happy and calm kids, we tend to make some mistakes when they are the most vulnerable. Children, like adults, are driven by their logical left brain and the emotional right brain. You must help them integrate both and derive a valuable tool for emotionally stable, balanced and a healthy life.
What Do You Do When Your Child Throw Tantrums Or Misbehaves?
Using logic or giving instructions when your kid is throwing a tantrum will not yield much benefit! You cannot deal with the “emotional tsunami” of your kid by simply asking him to “stop crying” or “calm down”. If you are expecting your kid to behave rationally when he is actually driven by his irrational right side of brain, you need to
- When your child is misbehaving, it may be for different reasons. As a parent you need to identify the reason first. See if he is craving for attention, feels alone or is bored. Once you have figured out the reason you have won half the battle.
- If you are saying the same thing again and again to him, you are actually irritating him. He will turn stubborn if you are nagging constantly. Instead you can be patient and explain the consequences to him. For instance if you play with water, you will get cold.
[ Read: Listening Skills In Children ]
- If you are treating his misbehaves or bad conduct physically, check yourself. Punishments will only make him all the more aggressive and resilient. You must allow the situation to cool down before punishing him. It is better to avoid scolding or punishing him when you are furious. You may regret your actions later.
- Do not lecture him every time on his poor conduct. Address the present issue only. He will stop paying attention to what you say if you scold him for all the mistakes he has done so far.
- Try to pay attention to him and become his best friend. If you expect good behavior from him, remember to behave well with him.
[ Read: How To Make Children Independent ]
How To Deal With Child Tantrums?
When your child feels hurt and let down, you need to acknowledge his situation first and empathize with him. Most juvenile tantrums result when a child is disappointed when what he expected did not happen. Take a look at what you can do in such situations:
1. Find him something that your child is good at. The most common cause of disappointments among kids is when they feel they are not as good as their peers.
2. Tell your kid success is not always about winning, it is more about finding the right path. Help him figure out the right approach to success.
3. Remember, your child shall watch the way you and your partner deal with disappointments. It is good to share your disappointments with him and tell him about the experiences you learnt from them.
[ Read: How To Promote Positive Behaviour In Children ]
4. When your child is being difficult, let him calm down. Then, talk to him about what he can do next and remind him of the ways he handled his disappointments.
5. Arm your child with the experience of determination and success that will give them the much needed cushion when he falls.
[ Read: How To Develop Self Control In Children ]
If problems persist, do not hesitate to consider counseling. Professional counselors may bridge the gap between you and your child and improve all channels of communication. Such an expert is the right person to determine the root cause of loss of self-esteem, anger, depression and aggressions in your child before it is too late.
Moms, share with us if you have any other tips on how to deal with child tantrums and disappointments in your child in the comment section below.
References : 1 , 2
- 13 Best Ideas To Handle Your Kid’s Temper Tantrums
- 8 Effective Ways To Deal With Stubborn Kids
- Top 10 Ways To Control Your Kid’s Anger
- Obsessive Compulsive Disorder In Kids – What Is It And How To Handle It?